Peeking through the fingers that covered my eyes

When I first decided to write a novel I thought that was all there was to it. You sit. You write. Time passes. (How much I never really pinned down though I remember doing mad calculations. If I write 1,000 words a day then in 100 days I will have a novel. If I write 2,379 words a day then in... I was never very good at math and completely useless at keeping to schedule so those Words- Per- Day schemes never did much good in the end.) Anyway, you write and then re-write and then you have a novel.

But as Robert Frost wrote in my favorite poem,

knowing how way leads onto way,

it was not such a straight path from blank page to finished first novel.

The most terrifying moment on that journey,so far, was the second before I clicked open the e-mail that contained my first critique of my writing.

I belonged to a different writing group then, New Writers Chat at yahoo groups. I hadn’t started the group and I hadn’t been there at its inception. I was the new girl on the block, in writing and status at the group. I had no idea what to expect to hear about my work.

In that period, I was trying hard to craft a Harlequin Intrigue style romance. I would read them and try to match my writing to what was in the book. I was so green I could of been grass.

Biting my lip, I let my mouse move toward the email and then away. I said a prayer to God. My stomach knotted, my brain was yelling “Why did you ever do this? This is a disaster!”

With a muttered, “Here goes,” I opened the email.

My eyes skimmed over it quickly, looking for some line that equated “You suck! Do you call this writing?”

It wasn’t there.

In fact, the person had been encouraging. Sweet joyous relief flooded through me. The words in her critique didn’t make me a writer. But that was the start of me developing my thick skin that all writers need to face rejection.

It was not in the words of her critique that I found my new tool in my writer’s arsenal. It was in the act of facing a possible rejection that I learned I could survive it, and that I felt the pride that came with taking my place in a long line of scribes who had done the exact same thing on their way to publication.

Note- This post was written for Fiction Scribe's Blog Carnival. Head on over and show her your support by taking part. She has one of the most informative blogs online for aspiring writers.