I write to keep me sane. I write so that my words may outlive my life. I write to find redemption

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

There is no back up plan.

From the time I was ten I knew I was a writer. I just knew it. Like others know they have a gift to sing, act, work with numbers, or be a public speaker. Some things are built into the DNA of who you are.

But with other traits, I think, is is easier to find out if your hunch that you are talented is correct. Just look at American Idol. Supposedly, some of these singers on the first few episodes beileve they can sing as well as Celine Dion. Now, our ears tell us they are dead wrong. And that is that. There is no maybe that they might improve and one day be a superstar.

With writing there is a chance to improve. Still, I feel like, to be a professional writer you must have some raw talent. I am building my life around the belief that I do.

This is not to say I expect my writing to make me rich and famous. That is not my goal in the least.

I expect my writing to be something people enjoy reading. I want to still be doing this on the day I die.

I love this.

And there is no back up plan for if I fail at becoming a published writer. I won't know that I have failed untill I am taking my last breath. By that time it will be too late to try something else. And that is fine with me. Because nothing in the world feels as right for me as being a writer.

Song Lyrics of the Day
I have a dream of my own
And it's mine all mine alone

Its been my friend since I was just a girl

It has a life
it has a heart
It has a soul and it's a part

of everything this woman gives the world

And it's a big dream
Big enough to share

Like a rainbow, hanging in the air

And I thank God, for making it come true
Makes me think maybe God's a woman too
Makes me think maybe

God's a woman too

Samantha Mathis

Sunday, July 23, 2006

Loving this!

I have been writing everyday. I am finally in that place where it feels like I am starting to know what I am doing when it comes to my writing.

Instead of stumbling through the dark throwing words around and then turning on the light to see they all landed in the wrong places, I have now found a small flashlight to guide me.

And if this writing streak keeps up who knows one day I might even get to turn on the light and feel like I can completely see what I am doing and where I am going.

Yes, it is still a struggle but with every word that hits the page now I feel like I am getting closer and closer to figuring this all out.

I hope everyone's writing is going well for them too. Many online writing friends have told me that they are having great successes these days.

So cheers to them! It is all well deserved.

Song Lyrics of the Day

Open the door
And show me your face

I know it's true
No one heals me like you

And you hold
the key

Never again
would I turn
away from you

I'm so heavy tonight
But your love is

And I do believe

Sherly Crow lyrics

Friday, July 14, 2006

Another Poem

The day of reckoning is coming fast.

I see it on the horizon now.

Just a few more
hours past
the time that is
dying now.

And you still refuse to back down.

you still
to back down.

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Mystery of My Writing

On May 8th I wrote a few pages off the top of my head. The first line was

I am a writer.

I thought it was just a throw away page but then I turned it into a tale about a man who is at a Writers Workshop. I started working on it again after I finished CBTM. And I am loving what I am coming up with so far. I have a good feeling about this project. It could be The One. The first novel I send to agents and publishers.

But, of course, there are many problems already with it.

1. It has 2,500 words and I have no clue if I can get it to novel length.

2. I write off the top of my head. I love that. I didn't know what the main character's sex was until he told me he was a divorced guy. I didn't know his name for weeks. I am still not sure if the name he has is his REAL name. But I also don't know the ending. I didn't know a girl was in the tale until she popped up yesterday.

3. It is in first person present tense. I am not even sure if novels in this tense sell, let alone first novels. But it has to be told this way.

4. I really want this one to be The One. I could be proud to put my name on this one. So I feel pressure to get it down.

But, overall, I am hopeful and excited to have stumbled into this project. I am also working on Andre's Story still. But the tone I have written it in is not gritty enough for this urban tale of a man just released from prison. So it is back to the drawing board where he is concerned.

Monday, July 10, 2006

CBTM is done!

I finished my 10,000 word short story. The last five pages were simple to write. This has been a great learning experience.
Still, I doubt I will write romantic suspense again. At least, I have no plans to right now. I realized I am not all that adept at writing love scenes and I am not even into action. But I did like how the plot relied on the suspense elements to work. It made it easier to decide what scenes to write.
There are other ideas brewing in my head though that are about personal growth. I hope I can make that as interesting to read as a tale of shootings, obsessive love and car crashes.
I am glad I got Allie and Spencer's story out of me though. There is an old post on this blog about me feeling like a bad mommy for creating them and then abandoning them when the going got tough. Now I have made things right with these characters and it feels wonderful.

What I am reading- The Big Bounce by Elmore Leonard

Song Lyrics of the Day-

For the life of me
I cannot remember
What made us think
that we were wise
and we'd never compromise

For the life of me
I cannot believe
we'd ever die for these sins

We were merely freshmen

We were merely freshmen

We were only freshmen

can't be held responsible

The Verve

Saturday, July 08, 2006

I'm on fire!

Now I have written 8, 721 words in July.
I have been squeezing in writing sessions every chance I get. There are only five more pages for me to write before I am done with my short story Come Back to Me.
At one time I intended to make it a novel targeted for submission to the Harliquin Intrigue line but will setlle for it being a short story.
This will mark my first completed short story. I'm excited about it!

Plus I am working on some fanfic, some story ideas that are meant to turn into novels and poetry. I am hopeful that one of the novel ideas that I have a few chapters on will become something I can stay committed to long enough to soon be saying "I finished my first novel." That would thrill me!
After a long winter of struggling to get some progress made toward improving my writing ( or even getting some words down on the page!) I am now stepping into the bright and glorious sunlight of a new day in my writing career.

Goodbye from you ever faithful aspiring writer,

Song Lyrics of the Day-
I thought,
like my Mom and her Momma before,
that I would die
where I was born.
Live a small town dream
in a big backyard,
raisin' babies and corn.
Now here I am,
one eye on the road,
Tryin' the read the map on the dash.
Nowhere close to makin' up my mind,
With a fork in the road comin' fast.

This ain't nothin' like
what I had in mind for me.
But then again,
the future
ain't what it used to be.

Megan Mullins song

Tuesday, July 04, 2006

10,000 words in July?

I have pledged to my Yahoo group to try and write 10,000 words in July. Other than the month I did the NaNoWriMO challenge I doubt I have ever written that much in a month. I usually run hot for a while then get stuck and hit another spell of writer's block. But so far this month I have already written nearly 2,000 words. ( That does not count the 700 I mentioned in the last post because that was last month.)

I am hopeful I can make this goal. I am working on several different projects that way if one gives me trouble I do not have to stop and wait till I make a creative breakthough on it. I can still be writing something else until I am in the mood to go back to the project that i am stuck on.

Song Lyrics of the Day
Well she's got her God
and she's got good wine
Aretha Franklin
and Patsy Cline

She used to tie her hair up
in ribbons and bows
Sign her letters with
X's and O's
Got a picture of her mama
in heels and pearls
She's trying to make in her daddy's world

She's an American girl
An American girl
She's an American girl
An American girl

Trisha Yearwood